1st Day Bayram - New Years Eve (Day)

Visitor Demographics

OK, the Google executives can relax, the imminent threat of me stealing all of their advertising revenue has diminished upon the release of these figures. Here you can see where people are visiting from for the month of December - thanks for your visiting guys - keep coming back and please leave your comments :)

Christmas / New Year / Bayram

Living in Istanbul, a catholic could be forgiven for completely forgetting about Christmas. If it weren't for emails from friends and family reminding us of the festive season back in our native countries, Christmas would come and go in a blink.

In lieu of Christmas we have the Bayram holiday, some of you familiar with my blog will remember my Bayram from last year in Olympos, Southern Turkey (see: Turkish Bayram) Bayram actually means 'Sacrafice' and if you follow my link I provided here, I prepared a sacrafice last year with some villagers, but spared you the images of the whole process. I won't push the topic too much, but I feel that Bayram should in fact translate to 'Butchering', i'm currently in discussions with several translation dictionary suppliers to have this misprint ammended :)

So, no pun intened, let's cut to the chase. Birnur and I are heading to Sharm El Sheik in southern Egypt on 3rd January for 5 days. We're planning on taking some dives in the world famous Red Sea. Keep this page bookmarked, we will be beaming images of our adventure right into your lounge rooms and into the darkest dens around the world as soon as we return.

For the geographically challenged (including myself), you can find a map of our proposed visit site just below. I wish everybody a fantastic Christmas and New Year and I hope that we can all catch up very soon.

Türkçe Dersler

Benim Türkçe Öğretmenim, Atanur, ve ben, Boğazaçi Üniversitesinde beraber ders yapıyorız

(My Turkish language teacher, Atanur, and I, having a lesson together at Boğazici University)

Turkish Aliases

Believe it or not, the name 'Mat' is not a user-friendly name for the Turkish people, it doesn't conform to the vowel harmony required in the language. Therefore, I have unwillingly assumed several aliases:

Ahmet: Generally when somebody takes me by surprise and asks me in Turkish for my name, 'adiniz ne?', after a brief hesitation I reply, ' ahhhh, Mat!' to which they interpret as 'Ahmet'.

Mert: On a daily basis people mistake my name for Mert, perhaps they just look at me and think i'm a Turk! (After all, the name 'Mert' conforms to the required vowel harmony.)

Bloguma Hoşgeldiniz

Yazmak için, Türkçem şimdiye kadar yetersizdi, oysa, çok çaliştıktan sonra yazmaya hazır kendimi hissediyorum.

Türkiye'de, yeni evime ve yeni hayatıma yavaş yavaş alışıyorum, her gün daha rahat oluyorum. Söylemeliyimki Türkiye'yi çok seviyorum, fakat, Avustralya'da daima evim olacak.

Bu sayfalar hem ailemle hem arkadaşlarımla iletişim için dir. Buraya ziyaret ettiniz çok teşükker ederim, lütfen tekrar geri döneceksiniz.

Friends Afar

Adnan (balls of steel) Khan reporting from deep inside Pakistan on the next generation of Islamic militants being indoctrinated, and other assorted childrens bedtime stories.

Red Tape - Ne yapabiliriz?

What is red tape? I simply define this as an obstacle to achieving one's goals. In my opinion, for every country, there are differing degrees of red tape. In respect of Turkey, one could be forgiven for mistaking the country as a veritable jungle of red tape. Let me illustrate this for you...

One could assume happiness by being granted a residence visa in the country where he or she lives, but unfortunately I can not testify that this is the case in Turkey. You ask why! Well, let me explain:

Firstly, the only tangible benefit to obtaining the residence permit is a feeble palm sized book that has your picture pasted in. The privileges granted to one for being the proud holder of this new status are "somewhat limited". So, what can one do with one's new found status? One can remain for an extended period in Turkey, in relation to myself, it is 14 months, as this is the line that I drew between my perception of a ludicrous price for a permit and outright theft.

So, now that I have the permit I don't have to leave and re-enter the borders every three months (USD$30 each entry), yes it's more convenient. What else can I do? I can also open a local bank account here and establish accounts with service providers. So, although I am married to a Turkish citizen and can contribute to the economy with funds from outside the country, they don't deem it necessary for a foreigner in this situation to legally work here. Of course, why would one want to work here when one's life is here? A rhetorical question for the said foreigner, yet a perplexing question for the powers to be!

If you're still not persuaded that my feelings and tones of this message are justified, perhaps the fact that one will pay 630 lira for this 14 month privilege may sway your opinion.

What is the relationship of this rambling to the definition of red tape you ask? Well, in a society where subtle discrimination originates at the top level and filters down to street level, one's goals and ambitions that are normally achievable suddenly slip out of reach.

As the Turks would say, "Ne yapabiliriz?", or, What can we do?

Ortaköy From The Living Room

Here is a picture taken from our living-room window in Ortaköy.

Odd Spot - Those Crazy Australians!

No this isn't strange, this is the Australian tradition of morning bathing in the mud. Australians perform this ritual just after wrestling crocodiles, this is shortly followed by beer for breakfast. If one ingests sufficient beer for breakfast, one must ride his pet kangaroo to work. Thanks for your pic. Luke :)

Venues & Departures

We recently visited a beautiful restaurant that I can thoroughly recommend to anyone who just happens to be in the vicinity of Istanbul. The web site has some pictures of Istanbul that are pretty nice. Check it out: Leb-i Derya

Unfortunately we were there to see Adnan off (again), he has just taken off on a 5 week trip to Pakistan and Afghanistan, personally it's not my idea of fun but then again, Adnan is a strange guy :)

Turkish Republic Day

The following pictures were taken on Turkish Republic Day of the Bosphrous Sea featuring the Bosphrous Bridge. (Not taken by me)

Beer Troubleshooting Guide

The beer troubleshooting guide, also known as the 16 Commandments of Australian Males, is now available in convenient pocket size. Rigid adherence to this guide is recommended.

Thailand - Kho Phi Phi Don

Kho Phi Phi from the beach lounge
L/R: Me, Birnur, Isabelle, Jerome

The hardcore diving crew

It's a tough life

Friends

Tanaz & Paola

Paola & Adnan

Paola & Anastassia

The Wedding

Sultanahmet Sarayi Otel - pictures courtesy of Adnan Khan & Anastassia Zlatopolskaia

The Wedding (Continued)

Sultanahmet Sarayi Otel - pictures courtesy of Adnan Khan & Anastassia Zlatopolskaia

The Meeting of Families

Sultanahmet, Istanbul - August 2006

Return To Istanbul

I returned to Istanbul as per plan in June, my new dwelling is located in Beşiktaş, a quiter option than my previous residence in Istanbul.

I am now looking at Istanbul and see a different place now that the sun is shining. Peoples attitudes are better and the streets are a buzz with activity all around.

The first week was spent completing wedding documentation as per requirements of the Turkish Government. The second week was spent at a small island in the Marmara Sea called Avşa.

Now i'm just settling back into life here in Istanbul and catching up with familiar faces. I am contemplating Turkish language classes very soon, actually the sooner the better!

My Mofo friend in Shanghai has a new blog, I have provided a link in the Links section so you can check out what he is up to! Hmmmmm, I certainly do not endorse any of the content in his site :)

Marriage Permission

L-R: Me, Birnur, Birnur's Mum and Birnur's Dad.

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

....or that's what they say (I'll be putting this to the test very soon)

Thursday 20th April will be an emotional day for me. It is the day that I depart for Melbourne, a planned visit of approximately one month in duration.

Although I'll miss Birnur crazily, of course, technology will assist us to maintain the bond and keep abreast of daily occurrences whilst we are apart from one another.

I'm really looking forward to seeing family and friends and frequenting some of my favourite Melbourne locations. Most of all i'm really looking forward to some familiarity back in my surroundings, and a seemingly endless array of cuisine selections that are simply not available in Istanbul!

I plan on returning to Istanbul in the middle of June to enable the finalization of wedding preparations and then head away with Birnur to Avşa for two weeks holiday in the sun!


My route home on Thursday is: (BA) Istanbul departing 5:25pm -> arriving London 7:30pm;

An overnight stay in London, accommodation yet to be arranged but i'm not too concerned where it will be. I'll hopefully be meeting with a friend there to catch up with as I wont see him again until the wedding in August!

Friday morning I depart London on Qantas for my flight to Melbourne, I suspect a stopover in Singapore (as usual!!!)

I look forward to seeing you all, catching up and exchanging news and happenings!!! See you soon!

A weekend in Ortaköy

I've lived here now for six months and I've finally located one of my favourite areas in Istanbul! For the Australian viewers of my blog, If you can imagine Darling harbor, in Sydney, with perhaps an additional one thousand years of history, and a few more hundred thousand people in the local vicinity then you're pretty close to imagining what Ortaköy is like!

The picture on the left depicts the area of Ortaköy with the Ortaköy Mosque (Camii) in the background. The big guy dominating the foreground of the picture is none other than myself!

If you look close enough, flanked on the right side of the Cami is a tourist boat that takes you on the Bosphrous Sea for one hour tour at a rate of 4YTL (i.e. AUD$4.00). It's fantastic value, enabling you to come to terms with the immense geography of Istanbul both on the European and Asian sides of the country. I can highly recommend the tour! We were lucky enough to see a school of dolphins playing in the bow wave of the ship during the journey.

Both Saturday (Cumartesi) and Sunday (Pazar) host the local markets which you can immerse yourself in for hours at a time. The local produce is fascinating, and very reasonably priced Jewelryery and fashion accessories seem to be the dominating produce with negotiation a must.

My newest pair of Georgio Armani sunglasses set me back a whopping 15YTL (that's only AUD$15). Compared to my originals, you can not detect any difference! Diesel belts ($15.00), earrings (from $1.00), necklaces ($5.00 - $15.00, high quality female dress skirts ($30.00), shirts ($5.00 +) and several coffees and chais later we were exhausted!

With too much shopping to cram into one day, we returned on Sunday to undertake the Bosphorousros tour. Below are a couple of pictures that we took on the trip.

Gunmen Seize Hostages In Istanbul

Hundreds of Istanbul Police overpowered two gunmen after they had taken hostages in Burger King Restaurant in Taksim Istanbul, just two kilometers from my house!

Read the full article here.

The previous bomb blast in Istanbul was Friday 31 March during the early evening in Koçamustafapaşa. Just 9 days ago! I really hope that things settle down soon, it's rather unnerving when it's so close to both my home and the homes of people that I care about!

Istanbul "Bronx"

Check this for high density living. If the weather permits, I walk to Bilgi University through this area to get to class. I call this area, "The Turkish Bornx" I wont name the area in case I offend anybody

PKK Kocamustafapaşa Bomb Blast

In Istanbul the traffic is a nightmare at the best of times, and Friday evening was no exception, it was horrendous!

I was travelling to Birnurs house in Kocumustafapaşa by taxi when I received a telephone call from Birnur telling me that the roads in her suburb are closed due to a bomb blast and she would need to instruct the taxi driver which direction to take me.

What The! Oh, of course, just another bomb blast, nothing too worrying, I mean it was only just under 1 kilometre from Birnurs house! Just another PKK blast to kill and injure Turkish people. Just lovely! Man these people are cowards!

Anyway, suffice to say, I made it to Birnurs house safely and with a minimum of fuss but the whole bomb blast situation really makes me nervous, particularly when it is so close to our homes, in particular, Birnurs home!

In an article posted by the Turkish Daily News (Turkeys only English based daily gazette) the whole situation seems soo blaze...I mean, here is the extract on this shocking event, "A bomb blast in Istanbul late on Friday, claimed by a radical Kurdish group as a reprisal for the victims, killed one person and left about a dozen others injured."

That's the sum and total of the news reporting that I saw on the topic, quite amazing if you ask me! Anyway, I stayed at Birnurs house on the Friday evening so we could wake early to visit more potential wedding venues. Not much else to report for that evening!

Joke - A Beer before it starts

A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.
When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start."
This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer, it's gonna start any second."
"That's it!" She blows her top, "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"
The husband sighed.

"Oh shit, it's started"

Joke - Two men camping

Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. One morning, the first friend says, "You know, we're starting to get on each other's nerves. Why don't we split up today. I'll hike north and spend the day looking around, you hike south and spend the day. Then tonight, we'll have dinner and share our experiences over the campfire."
The second friend agrees and hikes south. The first man hikes north.
That night over dinner, the first man tells his story: "Today I hiked into a beautiful valley. I followed a stream up into a canyon and ate lunch. Then I swam in a crystal clear mountain lake. As I sat out and
dried, I watched deer come and drink from the stream. The wildflowers were filled with butterflies and hawks floated all day overhead. How was your day?"
The second friend says, "I went south and ran across a set of railroad tracks. I followed them until I came across a beautiful young woman tied to the tracks. I cut the ropes off, gently lifted her off the tracks, and I had sex with her in every imaginable way all afternoon. Finally, when I was so tired I could barely move, I came back to camp."
"Wow!!" the first guy exclaimed, "Your day was MUCH better than mine. Did you get a blow job, too?"
"Nah," says the second friend over his meal, "I couldn't find her head."

Joke - Wedding Anniversary

Two guys are in a bar. they find out they have the same wedding anniversary.
One asks the other "what did you get your wife for your anniversary?"
The other man replied," A Jag and a Mercedes."
"wow that weird why both?"
"Well if she doesn't like driving the jag she can drive the Mercedes. What did you get your wife?"
"A pair of slippers and a vibrator."
"wow that's really weird why?"
"well if she doesn't like the slippers she can go fuck herself!"

Joke - A Dog in Heat

A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?

Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Dad said, "Bring Belle over here."

He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it and said, "Okay, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block."

The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.
Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home."

Joke - Kinky Sex

A man and a woman are sitting next to each other at a bar, both getting drunk. The man turns to the woman and asks her why she's so down.

"My husband just left me. He said I'm too kinky in bed," she replied.

"What a coincidence! My wife just left me," said the man. "She told me that I was too kinky for her, too!"

The two talk a little while longer, and finding that they have so much in common they decide to go back to the woman's house to have kinky sex.

When they get to her house she turns to the man and says, "Give me ten minutes, I want to slip into something more comfortable." She goes into the bathroom and changes into a full leather, jet black dominatrix outfit.

However, as she's coming out of her bathroom, the man is putting on his coat and walking out the door.

"What happened?", she said. "I thought you wanted to have kinky sex?"

He looks at her and says, "Well, I just screwed your dog and shit in your purse. I'm done."

More Turkish Vocabulary

Here are some more Turkish words and their English translation

tamam : okay.
memnun oldum : pleased to meet you.
bed de : me too.
sen de : you too.
adi : name.
ben adim : my name is...
sen adin ne: what is your name?
nerelilson : where are you from?
mükemmell : perfect.
nerede : where.
istiyorum : i want.
ne istiyor musun : what do you want?
istiyorsun : you want.
ne kadar : how much?
Taksim e gitmek istiyorum lutfen : I want to go to Taksim please.
bilmek : to know.
bilmiyorum : I don't know.
bilmiyorsun : you don't know.
biliyorum : I know.
biliyorsun : you know.
biliyor musun : do you know?
biliyor musunuz : do you know? (polite)
anlamak : to understand.
anladim : I understand.
anlamadim : I don't understand.
anliyor musun : do you understand?
anliyor musunuz : do you understand? (polite)
bu akşam : this night.
ne yaptin : what did you do?
ne yapiyorsun : what are you doing?
gelmek : to come.
geliyor : coming.
geliyorum : i am coming.
geliyorsun : you are coming.
geliyorlar : they are coming.
geliyor musun : are you coming?
geldim : i came.
geldin : you came.
geldik : we came.
arkadaş : friend.
arkadaşum : my friend.
dost : friend.
dostum : my friend.
ev : home.
evim : my home
şimde : now.
sonra : later.
konuşmak : to speak.
söylemek : to say
nasil söyledim: how do i say?
soru : question.
soru sormak : to ask a question.
cevap : answer; reply.

Basic Turkish Language Vocabulary

Here are some basic Turkish vocabulary, interesting huh!

merhaba : Hello.
selam* : Hi.
nasil : how.
nasilsin: How are you?
iyiyim : I'm good.
teşukker ederim : Thank You.
sağ ol : Thanks.
beğenmek : to like (someone / something).
sevmek : to love (someone / something).
aşk yapmak : to make love.
sevişmek : to make love.
yalamak : to lick.
dokunmak : to touch.
hediye : gift / present.
hediye etmek : to make a present of; to give something as a gift.
hele : above all; especially; particularly; in particular.
beraber : together; with eachother.
birlikte : together; with eachother.
birbiri : eachother.
besbelli : obvious; very clear; quite evidently.
bıkkın : bored.
bittabi : naturally; of course.
yerinmek : to feel sad about; to feel sorry about; to regret.
öyle mı : Is that so?
öyle ya : That's the way it is / was.
özellıkle : especially ; particularly.
özsel : essential.
pek : very; extremely.
peki : all right; okay; very well; if that's so, then...
pekala : all right; okay; very well.
ola ki : perhaps; maybe.
bile : even.
belki : perhaps; maybe.
belik de : it may be that.
bence : according to me; as for me.
bellek : memory.
içim: sip (drink); puff (cigarette).
için : for.
için için : secretly; covertly.
iğrenç : disgusting.
hemen : immediately; right now.
özel : special; private.

* Arabic origins

Permanent Resignation From Bachelorhood!

Today was the day!

I officially proposed marriage to Birnur, and she accepted, making me one of the happiest guys in the world!

Istanbul Winter

"Kar" translates to "snow" in English. Here are some pictures of the Taksim streetscape, covered with kar, where I live in Istanbul.

Birnur's car (Koçamustafapaşa)

my apartment building

my street (Yeşilçam Sokak)